Sunday, September 11, 2005

Thoughts of Gumbi

Little A is due here any moment. My breath of fresh air. The other night before bed she told me that she told me, "Mommy, I've been doing some thinking."
I asked, "About?"
"Gumbi," she said. I think I should spend a little more time thinking about Gumbi. Instead I just keep thinking about trust. And how much it sucks that one person can totally destroy your trust in pretty much everyone else. When you really thought you could, and then learn that you've just been completely foolish.
I even tried reading some Dalai Lama to make myself feel all warm and fuzzy toward the world. But I guess you just can push that kind of adjustment. In my head I can see how lovely it all is...but my heart is just impossibly tender and bruised.
That aside, I had a nice easy Saturday. After I dropped off Little A with her Dad, I had a glass of wine and finished my sleeve from "pin-up queen" from Stitch-n-Bitch, and half a hood for JMom's hoodie sweater. I went to the bookstore and browsed to my heart's content. I came home and made a Onion/Pepper/Gorgonzola Flatbread with a salad for dinner. Topped off with a nice piece of dark chocolate and delicious cup of coffee. All in all it was a great day. After I saw that N had left, I left his key and umbrella in front of his door. And even that was good. Just to get rid of it.
Little A is home and I'm off.


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